


Pistachios

by Tshilaba



Category: Soul Eater
Genre: Alcohol, Drunken silliness, F/M, innuendos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-25
Updated: 2015-06-25
Packaged: 2018-04-06 04:20:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4207692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tshilaba/pseuds/Tshilaba
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When alcohol is involved, any number of things can happen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pistachios

She'd decided what she was going to do. If Stein refused to accept her advances sober, then there was quite a high chance he would inebriated.

Unfortunately, her first test failed.

_She_ ended up wasted and, according to Eruka, had suggested he perform an experiment on her breasts.

Basic arousal. She could be so crude when she was drunk. Perhaps Eruka should make sure she didn't talk when she was drunk. No matter. She had a better method.

So long as Eruka mixed the drinks properly, Stein would be drunk in no time while she remained suitably sober. Medusa wondered, for a moment, if perhaps she should mix the drinks herself, only to realize that a small part of her trusted the girl. How odd...

~*~

A few hours later, Stein was on his, what was this again? She had to recount the drinks mentally for a moment. Six. Had he really consumed that much alcohol? He seemed so composed....

"Eruka!" Medusa snapped.

The frog witch scurried over. "Yes'm?" she said, running her words together in her haste as she wrung her hands near her waist.

"How did you mix these drinks?"

"Er, just like you instructed, Medusa," she answered warily.

"Does he look drunk to you?" Medusa hissed, a small snake sparking angrily out of Stein's line of sight, though fully in Eruka's.

Eruka shook her head, trying her best to edge away.

The blond snatched her up by the straps on her dress. "Then you can't have mixed them right, now can you?"

"R-ribbit," Eruka whimpered, shaking.

"Pardon me, ladies," Stein said, reminding Medusa of his presence.

She let go of the other witch immediately. "Yes, Stein?"

"I seem to have forgotten something. I'll be right back," he said, rolling out of the room and, shockingly, not falling over the threshold.

"Um, Lady Medusa..." Eruka said tentatively. When Medusa made no response, she continued, "Doesn't he normally fall over the threshold?"

_He does_ , thought Medusa, smirking slightly. Perhaps he was intoxicated. after all, mixed drinks were designed to hide the alcohol's taste...

Before five minutes had passed, Stein rolled back into the room dressed in an odd looking costume. "Ms. Eruka," he said, before either witch could speak. "I would have to ask you to leave now."

~*~

The next morning, Eruka attempted to sneak in a question as she handed Medusa her morning coffee. "So..."

"What." It wasn't as irritable as usual; it seemed a bit...bored. And maybe a smidgeon tired.

The frog witch deided to risk it. "So what was it like, Medusa?"

"What do you mean?" Th snake witch stared at her intensely for few minutes before her lips twitched into a smirk. The bitch was back. "A lady should never kiss and tell, Eruka."

"And?" Eruka resisted rolling her eyes. She wasn't willing to risk  _that_ much.

"Well..." Medusa took a sip of her coffee. "It was like eating pistachios."

The frog witch frowned, confused. "What's that supposed to mean?"

The serpent's smile widened. "Have you ever been able to eat just  _one_ pistachio?"

Eruka groaned. More drinks.

"Ah, ah, ah," Medusa said, wagging her finger in the younger witch's face. " _I'll_ handle the drinks. He's still my experiment."

"Right... Of course..." Eruka mumbled. Inwardly, she was relieved. Those measurements were a nightmare. But...

"I also want you to take Crona with you."

The frog witch slumped to the floor and cradled her head in her hands. Medusa and her pistachios. Eruka despised them. Even more than she ever had before.

If that was pistachios for the snake, then so be it.

~FIN~


End file.
